小喇叭开始广播啦(三)


第三集摘要:

声明:今天的小喇叭是讲给成人听(看)的,未成年慎点。


相信大家都有类似经历,有的时候,话都到嘴边儿了,却怎么也想不起那个词儿。然后突然灵光一现,脱口而出的却是发音相近但意思不搭嘎的另一个词儿(或者根本就不是个词儿)。往往在这种情况下,都会产生驴唇不对马嘴的意想不到的效果。


今天,给大家讲故事的是我的朋友Uncle Doug(道格叔叔)。Uncle Doug的人生经历非常丰富,从小跟着父母在很多国家生活工作过,是一个有故事的人。尤其对亚洲及其文化有很深的情结。


今天Uncle Doug讲的这个故事是他的姑姑Jean Leslie写的书(Glimpses of Calgary Past)里的一个真实的故事。他的姑父Jack Leslie在1965到1969年期间曾任卡尔加里市长,是第一个卡尔加里本地土生土长的市长。


Cappy~q~s Smart Reply


My neighbor Dudley Batchelor worked for the City from 1926 to 1963 and told me a funny story about our first fire chief, the redoubtable Cappy Smart.


"Cappy had a thick neck, short and stocky the way you~q~d expect a navy sub-altern to look and with a loud booming voice that wouldn~q~t require a microphone even if they were invented then. 


When the Duke of Connaught and his wife visited in 1912 Cappy was invited to show the royal couple the city. The pair was taken to the Palliser penthouse for the marvellous mountain view. 


The Duchess was talking to Cappy and after admiring the view asked, "and what were those little brown animals we saw this afternoon?"


"Oh, your Highness, those were gophers."

"What do they do in the winter?" asked the Duchess.

"Oh, they go down in their holes and ..." Cappy was stuck for the word hibernate



Suddenly he brightened and continued, "they go down in their holes and fornicate all winter."


His booming voice carried so that everyone in the Royal party heard!


消防队长的“机智”回答


我的邻居Dudley Batchelor在1926年到1963年期间在卡尔加里市政府工作。他曾经给我讲过一个关于第一任消防长官,令人敬畏的机智队长的趣闻。


“消防队长的脖子又粗又短,活像一个海军副官,而且声如洪钟,完全用不着麦克风(就算那个时候已经发明了麦克风)。


当康诺特公爵和公爵夫人在1912年访问卡尔加里的时候,队长受邀陪同公爵夫妇参观。他们被带到帕丽斯尔酒店顶层套房欣赏落基山美景。


公爵夫人在欣赏完美景后问队长,”我们今天下午看到的那个棕色的小动物是什么?“

”哦,尊敬的殿下,那是地鼠。“

”它们冬天干什么?“公爵夫人问道。

”哦,它们钻到洞里去。。。。。。“队长突然卡壳了,怎么也想不起来冬眠(hibernate)那个词儿。突然,队长眼睛一亮,继续说,”它们钻到洞里,整个冬天都在。。。。。。


私通(fornicate)! 


队长那洪亮的声音让在场的所有皇室成员都听得清清楚楚。


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推荐阅读

小喇叭开始广播了(第一集)

小喇叭开始广播了(第二集)

声明:该文观点仅代表作者本人,加国头条 属于信息发布平台,加国头条 仅提供信息存储空间服务。

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